Mixing it up

In response to Jules’ prompt on Carpe Diem #440, Ghost-Writer Jules, to mix up some short form poems into something longer, I am trying two elfjes sandwiching 5-7-5 haiku. I generally hate writing tight forms, but I rather enjoyed doing these. Do they work? I don’t know. I don’t know much about elfjes and am roughly following the guidelines here on a dedicated elfje site. What do you think?

breaking drought

patter
first drops
falling on iron
the cycle of seasons
autumn

above stunted wheat
the sky filling with rain clouds
farmers’ hopeful eyes

clear
rain flows
into our tanks
the blissful sound of
water

.

shade tree

stinky
horse manure
full of seeds
five large bags of
fertility

the sweet-scented soil
I dig the garden over
while the blackbirds watch

young
red oak
ready to plant
and hopefully very soon
shade

.

old ted

cosy
old teddy
on the rocker
remembering the play of
children

a baby magpie
squawks all day as if starving
Mum’s full-throated song

tired
her eyes
the young mother
hits the sheets and
sleeps

10 thoughts on “Mixing it up

  1. Great choice of combined forms – they share the same essence and spirit. These all very much evoke sense and emotion. I like the way the “bomb” of the two eljie are cpmmected with the haiku as a lovely japanese bridge between

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s